A popular series of my color pencil drawings was the “feelings” series. These pieces were all done in prismacolor pencil and graphite on bristol board. I had decided to play with a technique of layering the prismacolor pencils with texture layers of hard graphite that I had seen in some artists magazine. The featured artist in that article did beautiful photo-realist images. I was hoping for some of the same stunning results, so with these pre-conceived ideas in mind, I started just laying down color. I couldn’t stop. The whole process was mesmerizing. At the same time that I started playing with these color pencil drawing techniques, I was propelled into an emotional awakening.
Discovery of Feelings – An Emotional Awakening
I had been doing a lot of personal growth work, yet it seemed I was not moving forward. With the very first drawing, the process took over. My hand was guided by an elemental emotional urge. I loved the outcome, and decided to try it on a more realistic image. However, as soon as I pulled up a new piece of clean paper, I saw a different image appear. I let my visceral impetus free to express as I followed the perceived direction. Again, I was pleased in a gut level way with the outcome. Still, I wanted to control the next one. It continued.
“Oh, alright!,” I’d say to myself, “I’ll do it, but I get to do what I want to next time.” That “next time” never happened, and I was compelled to work on this series for several years, producing an archetypal series of color pencil drawings that expressed emotions that I was awakening to during that time.
Before this series I had great words for emotions. I had thought those were the emotions. This drawing process awakened feelings in my body and in my being. I was compelled to continue and forced to re-evaluate my words, as I discovered a new depth and connection to my emotions.
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